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This critique is on behalf of the group :iconwriters-at-heart:
I found this poem to be a bit. . choppy if you will. There wasn't a solid theme that I could pinpoint and focus on so I had to turn to my own interpretation of what it could have been about. What came to my mind would be something like "Love Gone Wrong". I think what also affected the clarity would be the format, though unique it was hard for me to keep a rhythm of some sort in mind. The imagery was present here and there, though I would have liked it to be more thorough. I do like some of the phrases and words you used though. Even with all that it affected the overall impact that it gave me as a whole.
Despite that I do like the vocabulary you used to emphasize certain areas. Makes it more sophisticated.

Overall you did good! Great job!
1 out of 1 deviants thought this was fair.


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